Magical thinking—the belief that certain actions, thoughts, or words will directly cause specific outcomes—is a comforting but misleading concept often found in religious settings, including the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS). This transactional view of faith, where promises are tied to blessings, can provide a sense of certainty and security. However, when life doesn’t align with these “if/then” beliefs, the emotional fallout can be devastating.
For many members of the LDS Church, the idea that righteous living guarantees happiness, prosperity, or protection from hardship becomes ingrained in their spiritual lives. When these promises fail—when marriages end, loved ones die, or careers collapse—individuals may not only grieve the loss but also question their entire belief system. This disillusionment is emotionally taxing, leading to mental health struggles like anxiety, depression, and even spiritual crises.
The Appeal of Magical Thinking
Magical thinking is tempting because it offers a sense of control. If I do everything right, life will go as planned. If I pay my tithing, I’ll be financially secure. If I raise my children in the faith, they’ll stay active in the Church. This certainty provides comfort in a world full of unpredictability.
Religious communities often reinforce this thinking by offering simple promises based on obedience: blessings follow faithfulness, and suffering is minimized for those who follow the rules. This clear-cut, transactional view of God appeals to our desire for predictability and assurance.
When Promises Fail
But life is not a formula. The belief that righteousness will ensure a pain-free existence crumbles in the face of real-world struggles. Marriages break apart despite temple covenants. Children make choices that don’t align with their upbringing. Job loss or financial hardship occurs, even when tithing is paid faithfully. In these moments, individuals suffer from the loss itself and the crushing weight of unmet expectations.
The emotional toll of failed promises can manifest in several ways:
Spiritual crisis: When magical thinking is deeply embedded in one’s belief system, its failure can lead to a full-blown spiritual crisis, with individuals questioning not only their religious community but also their relationship with God.
Anxiety and fear: When life doesn’t follow the “rules,” people may feel anxious, fearing they’ve done something wrong or God is displeased with them.
Depression: The disillusionment that follows unmet promises can lead to feelings of hopelessness as individuals question whether their efforts were in vain.
Shame: Many internalize these failures, believing their lives’ breakdowns reflect their own inadequacies or lack of faith.
Moving Beyond Magical Thinking
Letting go of magical thinking doesn’t mean letting go of faith. Rather, it’s an invitation to move into a more nuanced and resilient spirituality. One that recognizes that life is full of complexity and that faith is not about controlling outcomes, but about trusting in God’s presence through all of life’s ups and downs.
Here are a few steps to help navigate the emotional toll of magical thinking:
- Recognize that life is uncertain: Acknowledge that no amount of righteousness will guarantee a perfect life. Embrace the idea that faith is about growth, not immunity from hardship.
- Allow yourself to grieve: When promises fail, feeling a sense of loss is normal. Give yourself space to grieve both the loss of what you hoped for and the spiritual disillusionment that may come with it.
- Reframe your understanding of God: Move away from a transactional view of God as someone who rewards or punishes based on your actions. Instead, explore the idea that God is with you in all life’s experiences, offering comfort and guidance without requiring perfection.
- Seek support: Talk to others who have experienced similar struggles. Find a therapist or spiritual guide to help you process your emotions and rebuild a healthier view of faith.
By recognizing the emotional toll that magical thinking takes on mental health, individuals can begin the process of healing. Letting go of the need for certainty allows for developing a deeper, more resilient faith—one that holds space for doubt, pain, and growth.